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When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
06 November 2005 @ 02:13 am
I just realized that adding SO to MEURSAULT results in SOMEURSAULT. After some quick research, I have come to the conclusion that No One Else Really Cares.
So I decided to be Unproductively Proactive and make it my username.

So, verbing_noun becomes someursault. Update friendspages accordingly.

AND CURTAIN
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
02 November 2005 @ 11:21 pm
OOOHOHHHHHOHHOHOHOHHHHHHHHH MAN JABROZABOO
I will never be a Secret Agent Man! Never! If I were walking around with a gun trying to check my corners with no backup and a creepy tranny trying to kill me, I'd pee soooo hard. When she comes out afterwards, I was like DAMN don't just hug her, give her a dry pair of pants you know she urinated alllll over them!
DAMN!!!!!!!
Oh. DAMN! That's like the psychological thriller, killer diller.
I hope it didn't terrify Ali tooo much. I'm going to position the dvd with the scurry bug on it right by her face so it's the first thing she sees when she wakes up. AND IF SHE PEES ON MY BED I'LL STRANGLE HER!

Chicaaago

--STAMLANATOR or whatever
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
31 October 2005 @ 12:11 pm
I need to Re! Lax!
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
27 October 2005 @ 07:51 am
People I Hate:

My cat
People who wake me up on the bus like I don't know where my fuckin stop is
My cat
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
19 October 2005 @ 10:26 pm
GIVE ME YOUR JEW GOLD

Do you think I'm stupid? I know that all Jews carry around fake bags of gold to keep their real JewGold safe. NOW GIVE ME YOUR JEW GOLD.

BostonthenNewYork!

SWEENEY TODD.

I BROKE THE DAM
AND I BROKE THE DAM
NO I LITERALLY BROKE THE FUCKING DAM

Happy birthday to the prettiest lady in the world named Alison
 
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
09 October 2005 @ 02:32 pm
I rully do like this game. NAME THE SONGS

BUT KILLING PEOPLE IS WRONG!Collapse )
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
08 October 2005 @ 09:39 pm
Here's the question:
If you had a Theme Song that played any time you entered a room, what would it be?
I JUST DON'T KNOW IT'S SO HARRRRD TO DECIDE.

Now I just want to be a plasma physicist.

And eater of delicious bread product. How I wish I had some Amish breadproduct right now.

People die so often, eventually I'm going to cry a lot. So I've got that to look forward to.

...I work on Yom Kippur. Of all the days to work, I work on Yom Kippur. Bad Jew! So bad! I'm going to fast anyhow and I'm going to wait until sundown to Not anymore. And maybe my mommy will bring me some cakes or something! That would be magical, pretty much.

Everyone come to Caribou and order a Hot Apple Blast, because I love making them. They're pretty much fun. I also enjoy making Chai, though our procedure will change for thoses. As they stand now, however, I feel like a Crazy Chemist concocting Crazy Concoctions. And am!

I must be so tired I think I'm so tired.

I really want some hot chocolate and ice cream, an endless supply, and I'll dip the ice cream in the hot chocolate and eat it REALLY FAST so it won't melt! Green hot chocolate!
GINORMOUS HOT COCOA. I hate when person 1 says: I'll pay.
And person 2 says: no I'LL pay.

SHUT UP PERSONS ONE AND TWO

Oh I keep forgetting! Apparently Some Guy from "Queer as Folk" came and bought coffee from me. I haven't the slightest who. Coworker Jonesy came in an hour after The Event and was like: "we gave some guy from Gay as Hell some coffee befores" (I TOOK LIBERTIES IN THE STRUCTURE OF THAT SENTENCE). Ex-Coworker Bookstorer Shanne(o?)n recognized him vaguely from Something and asked WHO ARE YOU IN THE CONTEXT OF TELEVISION.
And he told her. And apparently I sold him coffee, and so there's that to consider.

I love that there's a new REI opened up down the street! Rugged People in Rugged Sweatervests/Windbreakers come in and make the place look like an Authentic Ski Lodge, which makes me happier than otherwise. I haven't been in the store yet, but I can't wait to climb the indoor rockwall like whales to the max!

Sorry though, I was just at work for 8 eight hours (woah why did I) unintentionally and now I just want some...CHICKEN SOUP!!!! OH MAN THAT WOULD BE SO DELICIOUS!
A) I don't want to go downstairs
B) I don't think we have chicken soup. Well, I think we might have that nastyass chicken soup with MEATBALLS. GRO TEEE

NOW I just wanna SWEAR all the time right now! FUCK FUCK FUCK. SEE ASS ASS ASS.

I really think the South Side is my favorite Side of Pittsburgh.


HERRHREHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE SHE COMES TO SAVE THE DAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY EXCLAMATION POINT
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
06 October 2005 @ 11:58 pm
Today goes down in the histories of Uncoolness. Ever.

I should write an Essay.
But I won't. Because it's futile. FUCK.

Often, I have fantasies of disease. My own disease. Cancer, tumors, usually, sometimes car accidents with horrendous broken limbs, but usually not because I'm uncreative and a sissy. I irrationally feel that Something Wrong from the inside out hurts less than from the outside in. I'm horribly afraid of knives and broken bones and my teeth going through my lip or a rod going through my eye, but I look on leukemia as a welcome visitor completely devoid of pain or danger.
It all stems from my desire for love, physical contact, and continued concern/affection for my well-being. And desire for immediacy and meaning and motivation. If I'm threatened with a fatal disease...Not, I'm not Ignored, I don't feel Unloved. But you know that special hurried vital concern people pay you when they think you might die. You know. And you know that's got to be a fucking good feeling and I want it. When someone is more concerned with your life than their own. That's nice.
I just want to come into school for a prolonged period of time, my hair getting thinner and thinner, my voice getting weaker and weaker, smile my sad, dying smile, and have everyone, even people I don't know, come up to me all the fucking time and make sure I'm okay and give me tissues when I cry because I'm going to die. And then not go to school because I'm having surgery and have people visit my room and cry privately and hear whispers about my impending doom and everyone would listen to what I have to say because dying people say the most profound things and ain't that just the godawful truth.

And I'm not ashamed of wanting that, it's horrible, it's horrible, but if I were dying I wouldn't be so fucking concerned with meaningless bullshit and I hate people but ohyes
ohYES
I would be ravenously, indiscriminately loved.
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
05 October 2005 @ 08:25 pm
Example #653422342668596u238398472348293jewernvwerowemweoqwmdqwfuck that I am Horrible at Phone Conversations/Recruitment

Phone: ring.
Me: hello?
Them: hello.
Pause: pause.
Them: how are you?
Me: ...good?
 
 
When Life gives you Lemmings, Make Lemminade
05 October 2005 @ 05:36 pm
PROOF IS PLAYING AT THE MANOR THEATER IN SQUIRREL HILL!
I fuckin...Jenfoe's watching the TV Guide Channel and I heard Gwyneth Paltrow do part of the scene Ali and I did in Act One from the other room.
She sounded like she fucked it all up with dramatics and overacting and The Art, but what the fuck EVER it's PROOF we've got to SEE it!
Sunday? Anyone? Sunday? And then Rebel Without a Cause/East of Eden Sunday night at Regent Square! We don't have school Monday, shoo yo, we can do anything we want!


LYSISTRADA SATURDAY! I pretty much love everyone.

BROWNIES ARE DONE BROWNIES ARE DONE BROWNIES ARE DONE